Hey guys! Welcome back. We all deal with break ups. Good, bad, and everywhere in between. They are never really all that pleasant. I recently went through one of my own. It wasn’t fun to say the least, but I suppose it could have been much, much worse. Anyway I decided to write my feelings out on here because that’s why we write right? So I figured I would write this to help work through the feelings and emotions inside me.
Since the day you left there has been something burning inside of me. How could you just quit? How could you just leave? I have tried so hard to justify it in my mind, but I can’t do it. I don’t have the answers I need. The issue will probably always be unresolved because there was never a clear reason. You gave a lot of excuses, but never a reason.
I was angry at you because of the way you chose to leave. I was upset that I never got to tell you how I felt that night and that I will never have the option to tell you this to your face. You hurt me when you promised you wouldn’t. You left when you knew I thought you would stay. You lied me and used me and I didn’t appreciate that. You made me question myself and what I want.
That night you made me feel as though my dreams and ambitions were too much. You said I was going to be in school longer than you and you didn’t know where your life is going. I can answer that now. It’s going nowhere. You decided to leave and not try. If you do that with everything else in your life you will get nowhere.
You don’t deserve me. I realized that night that you will regret one day letting me go. That’s fine. You won’t be returning. I have no time to waste on people who don’t want to be in my life. There are far too many people who do want to and they deserve my time and attention.
I don’t wish to see you or speak to you. I don’t wish you happiness. I wish to not think of you. I wish to not have this feeling of lost chances and missed words. I wish I hadn’t believed you when you said you wouldn’t leave. That’s what hurts the most. You said you wouldn’t leave, but you did. You lied to me. I didn’t deserve that. Not from you. You have added nothing to my life, but still managed to take things.
I can’t believe I fell for you. I can’t believe I allowed myself to believe you. In part this is all my fault. I should have known better than to believe someone like you. It was almost too good to be true. I do believe that everything happens for a reason; I’m just not sure what the reason is here. I may never know and that is something that I will have to learn to live with. I didn’t deserve you and you don’t deserve me. That is the only thing I would say if I could.
I’m not going to wish you well. I’m not going to say have a nice life. I’m just going to move on. I’m going to live my life and maybe one day you will regret your decisions.
That’s it for this one! I hope you enjoyed it. Please like it if you did. Don’t forget to follow before you leave if you have not already and I hope to see you next time!