Hey guys! Welcome back. Today I just wanted to share another life update. This is a big one and much more difficult one to share than I have in the past. But I think it’s important and I ultimately felt compelled to share it with all of you. If I am being completely honest, I am struggling. My life is so much different than it was a year ago or even six months ago. I have fallen in love, got engaged, and shared it with so many people. And though I love it and I am so happy, I am also not happy at the same time. And at this time, I’m not sure if I can share everything that is going on.
I have questioned myself so many times in the past few weeks. I have struggled with understanding how I feel and being transparent with my decisions and everything I am thinking. I have tried my hardest to have hope and trust that God knows what is best for me. But I also know that sometimes I don’t really understand what He is trying to tell me. I have struggled with having conversations about life, the future, and so much more. I am struggling with figuring out how my life will work out in a few short months.
I am grateful for the people who have been by my side from the beginning. I am grateful for the people who continue to stand with me even my life is an absolute mess. I feel guilty because I am not able to keep up with each one of them because I can barely keep up with everything that is going on in my life right now. I am not complaining because I know that everything that has happened this year has been an absolute blessing. I have learned and grown so much. I am becoming the person I needed when I was 15 and for that I am eternally grateful.
I have so many blessings to be thankful for. However, this is all completely new to me. It has been hard to process all that has been going on. And I know that in the end everything will work out the way it needs to. I know that I have all the love and support I could ever ask for. But I felt the need to write this. I felt the need to express that I am human and I am overwhelmed. I wanted to remind you all that it’s okay. Life is a strange thing because you can be completely happy and completely overwhelmed simultaneously. I know that sometimes I feel strong and weak at the same time. But I am not the same person I was a year ago. I have grown into a much better version of myself and that is all I could ever ask for.
I want to thank you all for your continued support and encouragement. I get to do this everyday because of all of you and I wouldn’t be able to without you. So I want you to know that even though sometimes we struggle, there is strength to push through. I love you all so much and I can’t believe that I get to continue to go down this path for the time to come. I can’t wait to see where this journey takes us, regardless of where it goes.